nuckin' Futs.

So I had no show to play this weekend. I had no plans with the family for Saturday night. I did have something in mind. I was going to get FUCKED UP! Its been a while since I didn't HAVE to be anywhere or doing a certin thing. All day Saturday was spent hanging pictures for the woman and installing a suround sound for myself all the while looking forward to the crack of that 1st beer. Shit it'd been so long since I've been real real drunk and got to enjoy it. Maybe a month more or less. Well to make a long story short my night of getting bombed turned to 2 and a half beers. I'm and animal I tell ya. Well at least I got some action in the sack. Not a buzz, but some lovin'. There have been times in my life where i would have gladly been sober for some ass. I thought I'd never say this, but this wasn't one of them. Maybe its all the stress I've been under lately. MAYBE it is anxiety like people say, but I won't go to the Dr. Or maybe I just needed a few shots of fucking jagermeister, ceap well tequilla and 10 beers. For a couple weeks I was luck to be getting 3 hours of sleep a night. My wonderfull sister, who is a nurse, had her Dr. perscribe me some Ambien all was well. Its back. I take an Ambien at 11:oo and find myself up still at 2am staring at the celing wondering if this is it. Am I finally taking the high dive into the pool of bat shit crazy? Or.....do I just need to get fuckin drunk and give my mind a break? This medicine didn't work, I think I'll play Dr. this time and self medicate.